文档介绍：THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A SLANDER
THE
AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A
SLANDER
1
THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A SLANDER
MY FIRST STAGE
At last the tea came up, and so With that our tongues began to go. Now
in that house you're sure of knowing The smallest scrap of news that's
going. We find it there the wisest way To take some care of what we say.
RECREATION. JANE TAYLOR
I was born on the 2nd September, 1886, in a small, dull, country town.
When I say the town was dull, I mean, of course, that the inhabitants were
unenterprising, for in itself Muddleton was a picturesque place, and
though it laboured under the usual disadvantage of a dearth of bachelors
and a superfluity of spinsters, it might have been pleasant enough had it
not been a favourite resort for my kith and kin.
My father has long enjoyed a world-wide notoriety; he is not, however,
as a rule named in good society, though he habitually frequents it; and as I
am led to believe that my autobiography will possibly be circulated by Mr.
Mudie, and will lie about on drawing- room tables, I will merely mention
that a most representation of my progenitor, under his nom de theatre,
Mephistopheles, may be seen now in London, and I should mend all
who wish to understand his character to go to the Lyceum, though,
between ourselves, he strongly disapproves of the whole performance.
I was introduced into the world by an old lady named Mrs. O'Reilly.
She was a very pleasant old lady, the wife of a General, and one of those
sociable, friendly, talkative people who do much to cheer their neighbours,
particularly in a deadly-lively provincial place like Muddleton, where the
standard of social intercourse is not very high. Mrs. O'Reilly had been in
her day a celebrated beauty; she was now grey-haired and stout, but still
there was something impressive about her, and few could resist the charm
of her manner and the pleasant easy flow of her small talk. Her love of
gossip amounted almost to a passion, and noth