文档介绍:&
The Decider
Where should you go on your summer vacation?
BY SCOTT JACOBSON
START
HERE
You define exotic as... Do you work Glad you’re honest. Go
A. Masturbating in the kitchen for hard enough to back to eBaying your
a change of pace. yes actually deserve no grandma’s knickknacks
B. A magical place where bottled a vacation? for beer money.
water somehow costs $.
C. Readily available Vicodin
quesadillas.
D. An Australian girl with
grotesquely stretched earlobes
and a TOOL tattoo. At the end of the day, you’d like to
kick back, chill out, and sip... True or false: You’re capable
A. Some rum drink with of listening to a hippie yammer
“hand job” in the name. on about his “rad steam punk
A B C D B. A cocktail with both constructions” without
dead and living bugs in it. murdering said hippie.
C. Something called
“herbal NRG blast”
that will turn your pee
lavender.
true false
A B C
Do you enjoy being The souvenir you’d like to
touched by disgruntled bring back:
teenagers dressed as cartoon
characters?
Wanna buy a photo of yourself
answering this question? It’s
only 30 bucks!
no yes
yes no
What’s your idea of a good time? Biggest obstacle to True or false: Intercourse
A. Finding time to fi nally explore my vacation sex: with a donkey is something
town’s many mall kiosks. A. Someone made a mess on of interest to you.
B. A drunk, naked Dutch guy asking the diaper-changing table in
to tap into my four-way. the fort station.
C. Anything that makes me throw up B. Genital sunburn.
funnel cake in my mouth. C. You’ve been kidnapped.
false true
AB C A B C
Staycation Hedonism III Amusement Park Burning Man Tijuana
You can fi nally get to all those All-Inclusive Resort $87 to stand in endless lines, A scorched hellscape. Techno On the minus side: violent
little projects you’ve been You won’t be needing your wal- eat, then upchuck undercooked music. Sun-damaged frea